What Sets Him Off

From The Past: October 3, 2007

These are the things that set Guido off. AKA: make him bark.

* Getting clean Wal-Mart bags (which we received full of groceries when we went shopping) or taking the broom and dust pan out of the closet makes him very suspicious. Actually he used to be suspicious, but now he knows what is about to happen, so he barks at me. He barks at me as I take the bags out and then he proceeds to run at my heels and bark as I change the bags out in each bathroom can.

Then, as I gather those bags up, plus the kitchen bag, he really starts to go off. His bark changes into a high, almost girly, bark, almost as though he is about to lose his voice.

Fortunately we have a solid screen door that can withstand the beating of his fierce paws and barks as he watches me take the garbage away. (Proof of these actions can be seen at the end of this post.)

* Removing the vacuum cleaner from the closet and then using it is a much bigger chore than it used to be. Guido thinks the vacuum wants to fight him. He thinks the vacuum is a big monster and he nips at it the entire time I am using it. How fun for me when I am just trying to get the job finished!

He barks when I take the vacuum out and he barks the entire time I am putting it away. You would think the “putting it away” part would make him happy, but no, he is still riled up and ready for a fight.

* The hair dryer has become the latest victim of his tirades. Before I started doing The Step Box exercise program, I had no reason to use the hair dryer as I take my shower at night and let it dry naturally. These days after I have finished my work out, my hair is wet with sweat. This isn’t a problem unless I need to go somewhere shortly afterwards. This is when I pull out the hair dryer and the Pug goes ballistic.

He barks as I carry it into the bedroom, plug it in, and then turn it on. I turn the air on cold so I can blow it right in his face. He then barks and lunges into the cold air. Sometimes, most times, I thrust the dryer towards him, so that it looks like a mad dogs head (the dryer is brown). This sets him off for another few minutes. Finally, after he has had his share of cold air, he settles down, but he watches me, and then he makes sure the dryer is put away.

* Birds sitting in the grass or on a wire in our backyard make him bark. Nine times out of ten the birds fly away at the sound of his fierceness, but then there’s that one bird who decides to stay and annoy him, thus annoying me. Guido will run back and forth barking his fool head off whilst the bird sits atop the wire happily enjoying himself.

* He also barks anytime the doorbell rings or when we have the front door open and he sees people walk by. When we ask him, “Do you want a treat?” he likes to bark, “Yes! Yes! I do want a treat!”

I do have proof of his naughty butt in action with the garbage and here it is:

“Is he doin’ what I think he’s doin’?”