A friend sent this email to me. I have no idea who wrote it, but it is very true.

• Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you’ve had a baby – somebody doesn’t know that once you’re a mother, normal is history.
• Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct – somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.
• Somebody said being a mother is boring – somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver’s permit.
• Somebody said if you’re a “good” mother, your child will “turn out good” – somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.
• Somebody said “good” mothers never raise their voices – somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor’s kitchen window.
• Somebody said you don’t need an education to be a mother – somebody never helped a fourth grader with his math.
• Somebody said you can’t love the fifth child as much as you love the first – somebody doesn’t have five children.
• Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books – somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his ears.
• Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery – somebody never watched her “baby” get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten or on a plane headed for military “boot camp”
• Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back – somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies to sell cookies.
• Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married – somebody doesn’t know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother’s heartstrings.
• Somebody said a mother’s job is done when her last child leaves home – somebody never had grandchildren.
• Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don’t need to tell her – somebody isn’t a mother.